Break's Over

My explanation for the month-long break, among other things that have fallen by the wayside around here lately, is that the kids are now on different nap schedules.  I put Ben down at noon, and he sleeps until about 2:30 or 3pm; then Sophie goes down.  At times I felt like I was using nap time for "me time" a lot, but I'm realizing that there was actually a lot I was getting done in terms of cleaning, blog updating, etc that's much harder to get done when there's a kid around, even if it's only one.  Anyway, there's my excuse.

The biggest change in Ben's life over the past month is that he has definitely entered the "I-love-Mommy" phase.  He really, really wants to be around me, crawl on me, pull my hair, chew on me, and have me hold him.  I seem to remember this is a 9-18 months thing... fortunately, he doesn't seem reticent to be around others, the way Sophie was; it's just that if he knows I'm there, he just seems to have to come over and try to make himself physically part of me!  Perhaps it's exacerbated or starting early because he's hungry all the time and associates me with food.  He LOVES adult food... can't get enough.  He'll eat Cheerios, but unlike Sophie, he gets tired of them.  Somehow he knows whether he's eating the same thing we are, so I've been trying to grind up at least our dinners in the food mill to get them to baby food consistency.  So he has gotten some interesting purees, such as mango curry with rice, wild rice with lamb and cherries, spaghetti and meatballs, fried rice, and chicken parmesan and pasta.  He has loved every one, and each time it seems like I haven't ground up enough for him.  He makes it VERY clear when he wants more food: he flaps his arms with locked elbows and bangs on his food tray.  Sometimes he also claps for more food.  And of course his face really says it all, too.  Since he has 8 fully-established teeth, there are also a lot of foods that I don't have to grind up as long as I can cut them into very small, chewable pieces.  Last night, he ate 1/4 of a hamburger patty.  And here he is on Fathers' Day eating some baked beans and cornbread with his dad:

At night, Ben has gotten very, very accustomed to his bedtime routine, which unfortunately involves me nursing him.  I'm not sure if there can be any substitute for that yet.  I'm not sure how much longer I can last though... with all those teeth, it can definitely be treacherous for me.  And I don't happen to have any sentimental feelings about nursing, so I'm pretty much counting the weeks until I can wean him.  Some good news is that, once again, we seem to be on a trend of fewer night wakings.  We haven't had any zeroes, but there has only been one during each of the past few nights.  That one may be at 11:15pm, or it may be at 6am.  So nothing regular yet.  I'm trying to be patient as long as I can!

Ben is a pro at crawling, but he definitely seems to have a preference for being upright.  If he can get somewhere by climbing up something and holding on to it while he takes steps, he chooses that.  It seems like he spends most of his waking time climbing whatever is available!  I wonder how long before he walks?  This is another milestone I'm anxious for him to meet... there are lots of activities that Sophie and I do -- like playing outside in the yard or going to the park -- that will be made much easier when Ben can walk.  As it is, I have to hold him the whole time so he doesn't eat things on the ground, and he's so heavy that I really can't hold him for very long.  He has about zero interest in being forced to just sit somewhere (unless perhaps there's food involved), so the bumbo seat and the like aren't getting too much use lately.

We had a great visit from Grandma Corinne and Papa Steve a few weeks ago.  The kids loved them.  Here is a cute picture of Ben with his grandma:

This week we'll leave to spend about a month in Ohio, so I probably won't do blog updates until we get back.  I hope to return with plenty of pictures, and hopefully some good news on at least the nighttime front!

On the Move!

Ben is crawling, and of course he loves it... so I love it, too!  He likes to just explore the house, seeing what he finds, and chewing on whatever that may be.  My new nickname for him is "The Clean-Up Crew" since you can count on him to "clean up" all the Cheerios he dropped on the ground while he was eating them in his chair.  (I don't seem to be the kind of mom who is horrified when my kids eat things off the ground... for better or worse!)  Here is a video of Mr. Ben crawling a little bit:



Ben is still extremely good-natured.  It's just so easy to get him to smile!  Someday he won't be this way, so I'm just trying to revel in the pure baby love while I can.  I think now that he can crawl, he's learning that it's ok to be by yourself sometimes, but of course he still strongly prefers to be where the people are.  I looked back at some things I wrote from when Sophie was this age, and I noted that it seemed like she was eating ALL DAY.  It's the same with Ben.  He nurses about every 4 hours (including at night still, boo!), eats Cheerios throughout the day, drinks water a couple of times per day, and also eats 3 meals of fruits and vegetables.  What a life!  But he works hard, too.  In addition to crawling around during most of his waking life, he has been practicing pulling himself up, and unsurprisingly he's getting very good at that very quickly.  He is SUPER strong!

Other firsts: Ben now eats regular bananas, not mushed ones.  He has 8 teeth, so no problem.  We just have to watch out, because he likes to grab your hand holding the banana and pull it hard toward his mouth to take a giant bite!  Like I said... SUPER strong.  Also, all four of us went to church last Sunday and Ben ended up in the nursery after he was too excited to stay with us during the service (he was a sight to see during the hymns... singing and clapping with all the energy he could muster).  Sophie was there, too.  It was strange to leave either one of our kids in that kind of situation, let alone both of them.  But when we came back after the service, Ben was having a great time, just sitting on the floor with some other kids playing with Legos.

This morning we went to the beach.  It was just me with both kids, but I still managed to get some pictures:

Years from now, I hope I can still remember what has become the quintessential Ben as an infant: facing outward in his parents' arms, grinning from ear to ear, with arms and legs both flapping a mile a minute out of sheer excitement.

Never Mind...

He's back to waking up twice a night again.  Booooooo... :(

He's also doing this weird screaming noise all the time!  Like an almost blood-curdling scream.  He might do it when he's happy or excited, or he might do it when he's upset.  Last night, all of a sudden, he started making the worst sound I've ever heard a baby make, like someone was murdering him.  By the time I got in there, he was just cooing and talking to himself.  I hope he gets better at expressing himself real soon!

This week he has also learned to roll over into a sitting position, and he's getting slightly better every day at moving forward even though you definitely can't call it crawling yet.  Yesterday I started giving him Cheerios, too, yay!

Little Guy is Getting Bigger

Ben is growing up fast all of a sudden!  He is really on the verge of crawling.  He gets up on his knees, but still tries to push off with his feet, so he ends up in a kind of push-up position that looks really tiring!  He can kind of inch forward this way, but he is so frustrated.  I think he knows what the possibilities are, but it just takes so much effort for very little payoff right now.  I know I jumped the gun in my predictions of when Sophie would crawl, but I'll still be pretty surprised if he isn't there in two weeks.

Ben is eating more and more foods, and although he will eat just about anything he's offered, we're starting to see preferences.  He has a limited tolerance for squash and beans... just like his mama.  This week I started feeding him those little Gerber puffs that dissolve in their mouths, and yesterday he learned to put them in his own mouth (after some funny episodes of forgetting where the puff went once he had picked it up!).  I think in the next week or so we'll try to switch to Cheerios, which definitely seem more wholesome than the puffs.  Seems like there is so much junky food even for babies.

Ben still likes to say "ah-gah!"  He doesn't do any other syllables, but he's been having fun experimenting with the different tones you can make by just going "aaaaaaaaaaah!"  Sometimes he will say "gah! gah!" when he's crying, which is just irresistible to me.

Also this week, he has stopped waking up twice during the night.  Most nights he has woken up just once, and once he didn't wake up at all!  Hooray!  But now the problem is this: after he goes to bed, we close both kids' doors so they don't hear us talking or watching TV.  Then when we go to bed, we want to open Ben's door to make sure we (or really I) can hear him if he wakes up at night.  But his door always creaks when you open it.  And it's not even that loud, but it ALWAYS wakes him up.  I'm sure it's because he's learned that sound means someone is coming in, so he's extra sensitive to it.  I think we'll have to get something to grease the door hinges... either that, or use our monitor again.  I'd rather just be able to open his door and check on him!

Today he had his 6-month well visit.  Not much to report.  He weighs 20 lbs exactly, which puts him in the 75th percentile.  He got some shots, which of course he did not like, but he was ok soon.  I think his sister was almost as upset by it as he was!  The whole visit, she cried and tried to leave the room, even though I kept telling her that we weren't there for her, and she could just read a book or play with my iPod.  After a while, she believed me, but then when Ben got his shots and cried, she cried too... for him!

Here are Ben and Sophie swinging together:

Not Feeling So Good

Well, Ben seems to be a little under the weather this week.  Starting on Monday, he has been very fussy all day, which many of you know is odd for him.  When I put him down or go away from him, he gets VERY upset.  He's also been sleeping a little more than usual.  Yesterday afternoon, he started running a fever, so I've been giving him baby Tylenol and offering him liquid -- breastmilk or water -- often.  The fever seems better today, but he is still pretty fussy.  No other symptoms, though.  I don't see any signs of another tooth (he's broken seven through now), and he's not coughing or sneezing and his diaper content seems normal.  So I guess I'll just keep watching him and giving him extra comfort until whatever this is has passed.

He's become very talkative!  He likes to say "ah-gah!" over and over.  We told Sophie that this is "what he says" now, so it's nice to say it back to him.

He's pretty mobile for someone who can't crawl.  He scoots and rolls, and he can get all around any room this way.  However, those kind of motions don't let him go forward, which is what he really wants sometimes.  John has tried to get him a little further along with crawling, but he doesn't seem close yet.  He never gets on his hands and knees, which Sophie did for probably a month before she actually crawled.  He's very alert, and always watches intently as everyone goes about their business.  I think he'll be very happy when he can crawl and pull himself up on things.  All in time.

On A Happier (and More Adorable) Note...

Here are some fantastic pictures that Grammy Sue took during their visit last week.  Enjoy!

Something over there is funny.

OK, how do I get my face out of the smile position?

Yay, old people are the best!

My great-grandfather and I are no longer amused.

What did you say about my great grandpa?  ...That's what I thought.

I hope you are not going to try to come between me and my food.

Ohyesgivemethefoodputitinmymouthrightnowyumyumyumthisismyfavoritepartofthewholeday.

You're going to give me more of that right?  Right?  Yes, put the spoon in that green stuff.  Then put it in my mouth.  No funny business.  Just put the green stuff in my mouth and nobody gets peed on.  Well, ok, you probably will get peed on.  But I'll smile at you during it.  Just keep that food coming.

Hey, I'm just trying to make it as easy as possible for you to put that food where it goes.  You can't miss it.

Stylin', as usual.

Nope... I'm just not ready to walk yet.

Time to chill.

Feelin' good with my Poppy Pete.

CIO Showdown

I'm up at 2am to write this post because Ben is screaming.  He has been crying on and off since 11:30pm.  I figure since I can't sleep while my baby screams anyway and I'm too tired to do anything more productive, I might as well write down my frustrations here.

In my time as a parent, I haven't really subscribed to any "methods."  I'm not really one to read parenting books.  I've just followed my intuition and tried to stay consistent to make it easy for my kids to pick up on patterns in how I respond to what they do.  I'm not saying I have such great mothering instincts that I don't need anyone else's advice, just that so far my kids have been nice enough not to do anything major that I'm at a loss for how to handle.

So it's not that I'm a particular fan of the "cry-it-out" method for getting babies of a certain age to sleep at night.  I think it's important to give them comfort if they need it.  But in certain situations, I feel justified in trying to let a baby put him or herself to sleep.  It's bad for me if my kids think that whenever they wake up, someone needs to rock them back to sleep.  My "rule" is basically that if you're well-fed and burped and have a clean diaper, I will rock you to sleep twice (or ask John to do it one of those times).  If you fall asleep easily once I've picked you up but you start crying again soon after I put you back down, I have to infer that nothing is seriously wrong and your main problem is not being held.  And after I've already rocked you to sleep once or twice, I don't really have the patience to keep that up indefinitely, and certainly not when I should be sleeping.  Of course, a newborn baby is not going to get this.  I don't know what the magic age is -- that's where the intuition comes in, and mine tells me that Ben is plenty old enough to pick up on cause and effect.

The problem with Ben is how persistent he is.  When I hear other parents talk about reluctantly letting their kids cry it out at night, the story is usually that they decide beforehand to give the kid 15 minutes to fall asleep.  The kid falls asleep in 15 minutes or less.  So maybe it's just that the moms who let their kids cry for longer than that aren't telling others about it because they're ashamed, but I never hear anyone say they do that.  When Ben is really worked up, he'll cry for an hour or more.  I just can't believe how long he lasts.  Here is tonight's story: tonight he wakes up at 11:30pm to nurse -- earlier than I'd like, but fine.  He nurses for plenty of time, and I put him down with no problem when he's done.  I think everything's good, but about 15 minutes later he starts crying.  I wait about a minute, then go in and rock him back to sleep, making sure to give him a chance to burp in case that's the problem.  Once again, he goes down easily.  Then about 10 minutes later, crying again.  This time John goes in, rocks him to sleep, puts him down quiet.  Then... crying again.  OK, now we leave him on his own: he's not crying like he's hurt (just mad), I can't think of anything that could be wrong, and we've comforted him twice.  It's 1:30am.  Well, like I said, I started typing this post after 2am.  I think he finally quit around 2:15.

I do feel really bad letting him cry that long, and I don't know how Sophie can sleep through it.  But I also just can't bring myself to reward that behavior.  So we see who breaks first.  It seems really messed up to be playing chicken with a 6-month-old baby.  My decision in this case isn't something I'm proud of.  But I still think it was the right one.  Sigh...